Ponder

The more my life goes not the more I learn about myself and at the same time the more frustrated I get. Life is about finding yourself, but in my life it is about waiting for someone to point out my flaws and teach me a lesson with them. I know I am not perfect but just one I would like to permission to think I am. Arrogance is a virtue that many forget about, I just want to live my life how I want, not feeling like I have to prove myself, change my attitude towards things, give people second chances, or be someone I am not. I just want to be ME. Me, Kayla from Iowa, who loves volleyball, art, and fresh cut grass. And the only people I want in my life are people with similar interest, that have no motivation to change me. Why is that so hard to find?

Relax

I am in never ending amazement how the small things in life are the ones that you remember and that truly matter. Little things like eating a cupcake at just the perfect moment, having it rain just as you are going to sleep, or a kiss just when you are in need of one. These are all things that no one thinks of or plans. So many people out there think the important things in life are ones of possessions and labels. Ones they can purchase with money or a little slice of their soul. These things may be exciting and exhilarating at the time, but will eventually get old and monotonous. The little things will never fail you, if you are like me and try to control everything in your reach you will understand how the little, unplanned things are the only chance at spontaneity. I wish I wasn't this way, but I have learned to live with this and truly look forward to the next little thing to happen.

Reason

I am a firm believer of everything happens for a reason. If i didn't many things in my life would not make sense, or would be ridiculously hard to handle. I am also a firm believer that every person you let into your "color coded" world was also sent for a reason. Maybe it is to teach you something about the world, or maybe about yourself. Even the people that looking back are now considered "mistakes". They transformed you into the person you are today. It took me sometime to understand that the person I am today is okay. Yes, just like each and everyone else out there I have regrets, but life has no do over. " Accept the things you can not change". That is the motto of my life. It took one person to convince me of this. I doubt that person even knows what a influence they have had on me. Let this be a life lesson to you all.. Don't think that the small things don't matter, they can mean the world to someone else.

The two most important days in your life: The day you were born and the day you realize why you were born.

-Larry King

Reflection

so long you had been with us

it hurt to see you go

whether you were ready

we will never know

it will never be the same

for we're no longer complete

but god called you to his side

with him we can't compete

they say time will heal

we wonder if they're right

for it's been awhile now

and we still cry every night

life is moving on

we can not complain

wishing you were here again

to make it whole again

There is an emptiness

right inside our heart

we hope you already know

you're the missing part

once again we'll meet

as our turns will one day come

not knowing when or where

just knowing God will call us home

he knows how much we need you

it's not too hard to see

for when you find one of us

the rest are sure to be

when we are together

you are still alive

for there is a piece of you in each of us

we have to let you thrive

we love you and we miss you

more than we can say

we'll keep your memory forever

and make you proud along the way